How to lock in without burning out

Because we have sh*t to get done and being your own worst enemy is sooo out

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It’s Monday morning. The sun is just starting to rise outside, painting the clouds fairy-floss pink, and the birds are chirping away (kind of annoyingly) in the background. I have downed my first cup of coffee for the day and now I sit on the toilet trying to attend to my… morning business.

I open my phone, the bright light blinding me for a second. I know I probably shouldn’t be on my phone this early in the morning but how bad can a minute or two be, really?

I click on the first video on my feed. “Let’s get locked in guys!” the girl in a matching set tells me as she makes her morning protein shake, runs 23km, hits an upper body session at the gym, works a shift at the hospital (she probably saves at least seventeen lives today) and then makes dinner for her gorgeous husband (gosh the girls in Utah get married young, don’t they?).

She’s right though, I think to myself. I should get locked in. I really could have my life together a bit more. I have goals to achieve!

I feel like everyone is obsessed with ‘locking in’ these days. Whether you’re training for a marathon, Hyrox or a triathlon. Maybe you’re locking in for a new school semester or you’re trying to earn a promotion at your job.

So what does it even mean to ‘lock in’?

My definition of locking in means leaning into your goals 100%. Waking up every day on a mission to succeed. And eliminating distractions altogether.

Now, let’s not get it twisted, I love to lock in just as much as the next guy. I have spent many a Sunday night writing lists of intentions on my Notes app, hoping that this is finally the week that I actually stick to my habits. It usually looks something like this:

• hit all my workouts with 100% effort

• get all my work tasks done

• no scrolling on my phone (ever!!!)

• take my supplements every day and night

• eat healthy (no snacks, no treats, no fun)

• do it all! AND LOOK CUTE AT THE SAME TIME

I’ll give myself some grace here, my intentions are always pure. All I want is to reach my full potential. I want to be the best versions of myself. I want to lock in, take life seriously and ultimately be successful.

But the problem with ‘locking in’, at least in my experience, is that it usually ends in disappointment or burn out.

After falling victim to this toxic cycle one too many times, I feel like I have finally found some semblance of balance. So here is my guide on how to lock in WITHOUT burning out.

1. Narrow down your goals

Often, when we are hit with a wave of motivation, we decide that we want to DO IT ALL. And we convince ourselves that we CAN do it all.

Now, I’m not here to be pessimistic or cynical. Because, yes, you can do it all. Just not right now.

Although it might look appealing to train for six different races, go for a promotion at work, start a side hustle selling scented candles online, finally try eating gluten free for the month (because something is definitely making you bloated and you really should sort that out) and save for your dream home, at the end of the day it is not be realistic to put 100% effort into all of these areas all at once.

What we are going to do is choose 2-3 areas of your life to focus on at one time.

What I don’t want you to do is narrow your goals down to just one thing. If you put all of your eggs in one basket you risk being derailed completely. Challenges are inevitable in life. If you are too invested in one area of your life, and something goes wrong, then you have nothing to fall back on and the emotional turmoil that can follow can be catastrophic.

So, instead we are going to choose just two or three projects in our life that we want to level up at one time.

Maybe for the next three months you are going to be in your running and reading era. Maybe this month is going to be super busy at work and to counter this you want to also prioritise spending more quality time with your family time. Maybe you want to dedicate the next six months to setting up your business and avoid spending so much money online shopping.

All I’m saying is, don’t try to do too much at one time. It’s about zooming out and viewing your life in years rather than months or weeks. Where do you want to be in two, five, fifteen years? Let me reassure you that you have plenty of time to make progress in all areas of your life, but in order for change to occur you need to give yourself the space and energy to try.

2. Schedule in rest

One of the biggest mistakes people make when they’re trying to transform their life is that they greatly overestimate their energy levels.

Let me tell you, effort requires a lot of energy.

No matter how good your sleep schedule is (or how much caffeine you consume), no one can be go-go-go all day every day. You will crash eventually. The human brain and body need down periods. If you’re training for a race, your muscles need time to adapt and absorb the training load. If you’re working on a creative project, your mind needs time to process, brainstorm and problem solve.

If you’re anything like me then you probably love to write lists or meticulously schedule out your days. I’m not telling you that you need to do away with this habit - the opposite actually! Let’s use our organisational skills to our advantage.

Schedule in specific rest periods and make them a non-negotiable. Stick to them with the same discipline as you would employ with your workout routine.

And while you’re at it, let’s add in a bedtime and wake up time that will actually allow for adequate rest. Gone are the days of getting under eight hours every night and pretending we’ll be fine. We won’t be fine!!!! We will transform into a snotty-nosed, screaming toddler who throws tantrums at the supermarket. And trust me, you don’t want to be that person. It’s not fun for anyone.

A note on rest:

Although lying on the couch or in bed scrolling on your phone might feel relaxing in the moment, it may not be the type of rest that you need. There are many different types of rest that affect your body, mind and soul differently.

If you are feeling constantly exhausted then you might be suffering from over-stimulation. You body might be getting rest but your mind is never getting a break.

Try opting for reading instead of screen time (far less of your senses are being stimulated at once). Or even better, sit outside in the sunshine, talk to a friend, or do chores in silence. Try stripping back your life so that your brain has less to process each day and see if you feel any better.

3. Progress is not linear (This advice infuriates me but it’s true)

I literally hate that I just wrote that ‘progress isn’t linear’ because like 1) duh, we all know this! and 2) it really doesn’t help when you’re mid crash out and searching for a lifeline to get you out of the pits.

Anytime I am working towards a goal and I hit a plateau or encounter a set-back all I want to do is:

a) scream

b) cry

c) lock in harder

d) GRIND GRIND GRIND until I see real progress

What I don’t want is someone calmly telling me that ‘progress isn’t linear’. Like shut up??? I want to be rewarded for my hard work and I want it NOW!

For example, I am currently training for my third marathon. At about week 6 of my training block I definitely hit a wall. The volume had been slowly creeping up, I did my first +30km long run, plus I’d been travelling for a family event over the weekend which meant I started the next week a little less recovered than usual.

So, when I turned up at the track on Wednesday to do my schedule speed workout I had nothing to give. I’ll spare you the details (mostly to save myself from embarrassment) but there were a lot of tears and not much running. I left feeling completely defeated and disappointed in myself.

The logical part of brain tried to comfort me. “Not every session is going to go perfectly. You’re probably just tired from the travel. You’re hormonal too so go easy on yourself.”

But it didn’t help. The demanding part of my brain fought back harder. “You’re weak. You’re not trying hard enough. You’re ungrateful - last year you would have killed to be able to run injury-free, and now you’re just being lazy. You’re lucky to even have the opportunity to run the Sydney marathon - why are you throwing this opportunity away! Maybe you aren’t cut out for this. Maybe you should just quit now.”

It’s funny looking back at this session now two weeks later. As I write this I just got back from another track session where I had one of my best workouts of my entire life. I felt light on my feet, the paces felt so easy that I actually had to hold myself back, and I now have full confidence that I will show up to race day better prepared than ever before. The difference two weeks can make…

Plateaus and setbacks are part of life, especially when you’re working towards a goal that matters to you. What I’ve found to be the antidote in these moments is to approach things with CURIOSITY.

Now whenever something doesn’t go according to plan I ask myself questions like:

• I wonder what this period is going to teach me?

• I wonder how long this plateau will last? (Because I know it won’t be forever, even if it feels that way right now)

I like to think of myself as a character in a movie sometimes (it helps me step back, zoom out, detach and see my life a little more clearly). Things always make sense eventually. In the movie that is my life, what is my character going through right now? And how is it going to get tied up in an neat, albeit ironic, bow sometime in the near future?

Start observing how your life unfolds in surprising ways and I promise things will get a little easier.

4. Make time for connection

Lastly, I think one of the biggest blunders that we make when we are trying to ‘lock in’ is that we try to eliminate all ‘distractions’.

Distractions are anything that might slow us down in our pursuit of our big goal.

Often this means removing time for connection with friends or time with loved ones and spontaneity.

Although social time can often feel like it slows us down, it is actually an essential part of reaching your goals. It is the lifeline that allows you to keep going when things get tough. It brings colour and meaning to life. Like the age-old adage says, ‘if you want to go fast, go alone but if you want to go far, go together’.

And, at the end of the day, will you really care that you got a big promotion or ran a PB if you have no one to celebrate it with afterwards?

Again, if you feel the need to ‘lock in’ to have a sense of control over your life, then make sure you schedule in time for friends, family and loved ones. It will increase the longevity of your efforts and bring meaning to your life.

I have a lot of big goals over the next few months, one of which is to reach new audiences with this newsletter. It would mean the world if you could like and share this article with a friend (or every person you have ever met) who might need a gentle reminder to not be so hard on themselves.

Let’s lock in together, but in a easy-going, cool-girl type of way so we don’t all burn ourselves out. Pinky promise?

Thank you for taking the time to read Whatever Works! The fact that you’ve made it this far tells me that you also have goals that you value deeply and are ready to work hard to make them happen. Getting this Substack to more people is a dream of mine so it would mean the world if you would share this with the people in your life who need to hear it.